You may give your child with special needs or incapacitated spouse a Valentine this month as an expression of your love for them.  But how can you express a lasting love for that child or spouse who depends on you for care and support?  How can you ensure that your special needs family member will remain well cared for and secure if others must later assume the role of guardian or caregiver?  While creating a financial plan and establishing a “special needs trust” are central to preparing for your child’s or spouse’s future, families of children with special needs should write down their intentions and expectations, as well as the child’s medical, physical, mental, emotional, family and religious history, in a document referred to as a Memorandum of Intent, also known as a “Letter of Intent.”  And for this Valentine’ month, I would like to call it a “LOVE” Letter – a “Letter Of Values and Expectations.”
The Memorandum is not legally binding and, when directions conflict, those in wills, trusts and other legal documents take precedence.  But for “non-legal” matters, it will serve as the primary source of information about your child or incapacitated spouse, providing a roadmap for the courts, guardians, caregivers and others involved in that person’s life.  That can be critical in easing your child’s transition, ensuring continuity of care and treatment, as well as appropriate decision making regarding living arrangements and other lifestyle choices.
Topics that should be included in a Letter of Intent include the following:

• Individuals and organizations that should be contacted upon your death or incapacity to provide services
• Your child’s or spouse’s medical history and health care and therapeutic needs
• Your preferences for education, religion, cultural and caregiving practices
• Contact information for doctors, therapists and teachers
• The individual’s personal history, degree of independence or mobility, behavioral issues, and need for assistive technologies and types of oversight and supervision
• The person’s interests, personality traits, likes and dislikes
• The location of medical records and other important documents
• Guidance about the person’s interactions with friends and family
• Description of the child’s physical and functional abilities

While writing a Letter of Intent can be time-consuming, it’s very important not to postpone this task.  Once the Letter Of Values and Expectations is complete, place the original in a secure location and distribute copies to others involved in your child’s or spouse’s life (including future successor caregivers and trustees).  Then, mark your calendar, setting aside time to revise the Memorandum at least once a year so it will continue to reflect that person’s current life stage and situation.
If you have a child or spouse with special needs, contact us about including a Letter of Intent in your estate plan and care plan for that person.  We have a comprehensive form for such a Letter of Intent that can guide you through the process and help secure your child’s future.  Contact us online or call us today at 601-987-3000.